Posted 3:26 AM by Robert
Here I am, sitting at my computer at 3 in the morning. School is done. I've finished my finals, and all that's left to do is pack up, load my car, and drive home. That means I'm here at LCC for one more day. One more day to talk to Megan. But I won't. Whether or not she likes me (though I think she does), she will be remembered as "the one that got away." It's likely that I won't see her tomorrow; I'm sure she'll be leaving at some point in the afternoon. I've considered e-mailing her at her school address, in case she checks it one more time before our accounts are erased in June. As I said before, the thing I'm most concerned with at this point is just telling her how I feel. But e-mail still seems cheesy. It's in the back of my mind, but I probably won't do it.

There's an old French proverb: "Plus ca change, plus c'est la meme chose" -- "The more things change, the more they stay the same." No matter what, things will be just as they are now. Philadelphia sports teams will always come close to a championship, only to fail. I'll always suffer through heartache and disappointment. I'll always want to say how I feel, but keep it bottled up inside. I'll always want to take a risk and do something bigger than myself, but choose to play it safe and take the easy way out instead. No matter what, I'll always be that person. It's who I am. But I don't want to be that empty shell of a man. I want to be something more.

Lord, I want to be something more. I need to be something more. At this point, I just need a miracle . . .